Marriage

The Wedding Trumped the Blog

December 20, 2016

Confession: I have been MIA and haven’t blogged in months, but for good reason! The wedding trumped the blog. In my memory it actually trumped everything. 

Are there ever times in your life when several things are happening all at once? And somehow, in the midst of it all, you get the distinct feeling God is trying to tell you something, but you’re not sure what He is saying?

My year, in summary, goes like this: moved 2 children, Mark ruptured 3 discs in one move and hasn’t fully recovered after 5 months, turned over 3 employees on my team at work (these girls need to stop having babies–kidding), co-authored two books with Mark to be released early 2017, AND Megan got married!

The wedding planning, with everything else that happened this year, was fast and furious. It is all a total blur. And then, somehow God brought the whole wedding weekend together, and each event—the bridesmaids luncheon, rehearsal dinner, wedding, reception—was crystal clear.  I say that with tears in my eyes because I truly felt like He froze time for me.  I finally heard loud and clear…bask in this…this moment of joy…this blessing of Megan’s marriage. God knew I needed to remember this.

 This year has been a strange season where the joys and struggles are co-mingled. Ironically, as I was experiencing joy planning a wedding with Megan, I was also struggling to write Lists to Love By for Busy Wives and Lists to Love by for Busy Husbands with my husband, Mark. When I write it is a struggle because I want to be transparent. That means a lot of soul-searching about my mistakes and the lessons learned. 

Writing Lists to Love By made me reflect on the beginning of my own marriage, as I was simultaneously reflecting on the beginning of Megan’s. And I discovered something—we are culturally obsessed with weddings, not marriage.  Looking back, I spent a lot more time planning my wedding than I did planning my marriage. This is backward. And I wanted Megan to anticipate and plan for her marriage more than her wedding. 

God never fails to work my life out. And so much of what I want Megan to know about loving Hampton and marriage was poured into the Lists to Love By books. At the same time, I developed a plan for both of us to ponder what marriage means and has meant for decades. That plan started with a book I found with my grandmother’s wedding dress called A Marriage Souvenir from 1884. It turned into a series of messages from me to Megan.  We called them Marriage Messages.

The wedding was the highlight of my blogging hiatus, so consider yourself caught up. I won’t go on about the wedding from here out.  Friends have asked me for the details and I am posting them all. Please use all of what I learned planning the wedding and pondering the meaning of marriage.  The links are here:

  • Marriage Messages: 20 notes about the meaning of marriage in PDF if you want to print and use.
  • The Ceremony Vows: The pastor’s wedding message was so honoring to God and brought us all to tears.  It was the highlight for our family and examples of vows are hard to find even online.  So feel free to take inspiration from the amazing words of Pastor Denny Heiberg.
  • The Pictures and Details: the venue, the vendors and the pictures of the day that is frozen in my memory!
  • For Better, For Worse: Helping Megan prepare for the “better” and “worse” of marriage and how to glorify God through it all. 
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  • Lisa

    One of mine sons just married too, and it truly is a frozen in time joyful moment! Thank you so much for sharing, your Megan is so so beautiful! Looking forward to the release of your new books!